‘"You don't own a name"’: Entitled sister-in-law claims she will name her baby after woman's late 7-year-old daughter, then doubles down when woman calls her out

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
May 24, 2025 9:00 AM EDT

Grief is a weird, sensitive thing. No single person grieves exactly the same as another, and that's because we're all different in the way we feel and process emotions. Losing a loved one, especially prematurely, is never an easy thing to go through; you'd hope that the family you have around you is supportive in any way you choose to grieve, and don't try to overstep any boundary you might have set for them. Some family members, however, might try to turn your grief into their own, which is when you have to put your foot down in the middle of feeling all of those strong feelings. Nothing is worse than an entitled person who thinks they know what should and shouldn't make you upset in the grieving process…

As the title suggests, a grieving mother posted this next story, explaining that her sister-in-law is naming her future baby after the grieving mother's late child, who passed years before. Tone deaf isn't the word. Scroll to read.

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  • 08 09 2021 07 185 "I said it felt disrespectful, especially because they didn't ask me first.”
    via Amr Taha™ for Unsplash

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "My Sister-In-Law Tried to Name Her Baby After My Late Daughter"

    This happened a month ago, and I still haven't spoken to my brother's wife.
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • My daughter passed away three years ago. She was only 7. Sudden illness. No warning. Her name was Maren.
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • My brother (35m) and his wife (34f) are expecting their first baby in July. They announced at a family BBQ that they're naming her "Maren Rose."
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • I (33f) nearly dropped my plate. I didn't even know they were considering that name. It felt like a punch in the chest.
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • Afterwards I pulled my brother aside and said I was shocked they'd use Maren's name. His response?
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • "We loved that name too, and we thought it would be a sweet way to honor her. You don't own a name."
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • I said it felt disrespectful, especially because they didn't ask me first. My daughter's name is tied to grief and trauma for me.
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • Hearing it constantly, as the name of another little girl, just feels like being gutted over and over. His wife messaged me later saying she was sorry I felt that way, but they're "not changing the name."
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • Cheezburger Image 10509061888
    via Blake Cheek For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I feel like I'm going crazy. Would you be okay with this?
    via Brilliant-Extreme397
  • Severe_Chicken213 I'd have no more brother after that stunt. And anybody on his side can go too.
    via Severe_Chicken213
  • Delta9THICC NOR, that's actually disgusting on your brother's part. How can he think that's even remotely OK?
    via Delta9THICC
  • Mintcrisp I would absolutely lose it. Mentally, it would destroy me. The only way for you to continue through this is to cut them off. They have no respect. If they wanted to honour your daughter, they would have backed off when they knew how you felt.
    via Mintcrisp
  • SalesTaxBlackCat NTA. Your brother and SIL are pain piggybacking. Usurping the attention directed at you during this tragedy. They're banking on the attention they'll get by naming their daughter after your daughter. It's a thing to do - I'd cut them off for the time being until this is sorted out, or never if they proceed with their plan.
    via SalesTaxBlackCat
  • seecarlytrip The fact that he stated that they loved the name too and you don't own the name, rather than they loved Maren, their niece, too just shows that they aren't even naming their child after her. They just like the name itself and are using the "honoring her" excuse
    via seecarlytrip
  • as a way to justify using the same name and trying to make it look not so f ed up on their part. Even if their only motive was to honor your daughter, it's only okay if they have your permission. They are literally choosing a name over your pain, suffering, and heartache. That's so messed up.
    via seecarlytrip
  • TNC36913 They are extremely selfish and inconsiderate for doing this. I am so very sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine how painful it will be hearing another child in your own family being called this when you are wishing it was your own child still being called this.
    via TNC36913

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family dynamics family drama baby names entitled parents entitlement reddit story family feud parenting in laws entitled family reddit thread parent Reddit Parenting Fail parents entitled people
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